Bad Mother Music

So I run into my pianist friend Yumiko at Cub. There she is rounding the corner to Pharmacy. I love running into her. She’s like, how are you? I’m like, how are you?!?!

Yumiko says she’s in between recitals. She dislikes the down times. Me too. She says it seems odd to have a teenager. Me too. She says she’d like to do some new art. Me too.

She says her daughter just got her permit. My son, too.

While we’re talking, my phone rings about five times and I also get about five texts. I don’t know it at the time. Jake has customized his ring so when he calls me, it’s his voice saying “Mom, pick up the phone pick up the phone pick up the phone.” It’s loud in Cub. I’m talking and Yumiko is talking. I don’t hear my phone asking to be picked up, so I don’t, and forty-five minutes after debate team practice ends, Jake calls the coach who comes all the way back to the school and drives my child home.

Yumiko says, what should be our topic?

Bad Mother Music. A song cycle by Yumiko Oshima-Ryan & Ann Rosenquist Fee. Sneak preview Saturday, Feb. 18, 2012, 7:00 p.m. in Music Area Room 103 in the Schaefer Fine Arts Center at Gustavus Adolphus College. Bad mothers wishing to be on the guest list should get in touch: annrosenquistfee {at} hotmail.com. You know who you are.

6 comments on “Bad Mother Music

  1. I had to tweet about this. It’s great. I love what you’re doing.

  2. chelsea kocina says:

    I love you more than delicious fried things—and that’s a lot of freaking love Ann.

  3. weight4me says:

    More Bad Mother Lyrics

    It’s the end of the day, and all seems so peaceful
    But inside, my conscience is totally beast-full;
    I’ve prayed and I’ve asked God for total release-full
    For I’ve given birth to a grown up mystique-full.
    Who is beating herself for forgetting her son,
    For ignoring his call when debate team was done.
    But I know her best and her heart is pure gold!
    Her brain is amass with talent untold.
    She is gracious, and loving; a true, loyal friend;
    Someone you can count on right through to the end.
    She ignores her own need to give time to another
    And you’d never know that she had a Bad Mother!
    .

  4. Amy Kortuem says:

    I’m there. Though I’m not a mother. Just the bad hired help for a cat that peed on the floor because I didn’t get up and feed him when he wanted. Which got me thinking:

    (to the tune of Canon in D, not the canon part, the upper part):

    Bad Cat Lady

    I
    hate
    you,
    you
    need-
    y
    fur-
    ball.

    How
    you
    me-
    ow
    as
    first
    light
    fall.

    Like
    a-
    no-
    ther
    cou-
    ple
    min-
    utes

    Will
    starve
    you
    be-
    yond
    your
    lim-
    its.

    And then how you
    claw at the door
    as if that will
    get you some more
    cat chow that comes
    o’er from Europe
    and causes you
    bad cat-breath burps.

    So I put the
    pillow over
    my head and pray
    to Jehovah
    as my witness
    I’ll deep six you
    if you don’t let
    me sleep…shit you

    are too
    qui-
    et oh no…
    that can mean on-
    ly one thing and..

    Now I’m up and I’m running to the litter box
    and seeing it’s full and there’s litter spilling o’er the top and
    you are standing there be-e-side the kitchen door
    and squatted in that stance I hate to see and what’s more

    You’re letting go and you’re peeing on the kitchen rug
    and looking at me like I’m some disgusting little bug and
    then you finish and you swish your fluffy tail and
    step in the pee and you track it o’er the floor and bail and

    this
    is
    why
    I’m
    not
    a
    mo-
    ther

    cats
    you
    can
    give
    to
    a-
    no-
    ther

    You
    can’t
    pick
    up
    your
    first-
    born
    and

    lock
    him
    in
    the
    laun-
    dry
    room
    and…

    I
    hate
    you,
    you
    need-
    y
    fur-
    ball…

    (Come over sometime. I’ll sing it for you.)

  5. bad mother musician says:

    Utter genius – this one is my favorite yet. I always wondered if those hideous recurring nightmares of forgetting to pick up your kid after Whatever Practice ever went away. Apparently they only get replaced (sometimes prematurely) by fears of them getting into accidents when driving themselves home. Oh the pains of Bad Parenthood

  6. Erinn says:

    Bad is sexier!!

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